When it comes to learning more about Christ, His greatest commandment is to love. I've always been apprehensive to talk about love on my blog because I'm NO expert. However, I do have access to someone who is! So from time to time, I will start to share what God impresses upon my heart on the subject of love! :)
We'll focus on romantic love this time. So, I've been battling a cold for the last couple of days. When I get sick, I try to put my game face on but the older I get, the more I wish I had someone to baby me when I'm sick. So while brewing my own tea and giving myself medicine, I started to mentally take notes of the discussions that would come up in pre-marital counseling with my future husband (yes, guys! we can go alllll the way there). I came up with some of these requirements:
1. When I'm sick, he will give me Epsom salt baths.
2. When I'm sick, he will run to the store at any hour to get medicine, vitamin c, cough drops, etc.
3. When I'm sick, he will hold down the fort.
4. When I'm sick...
5. When I'm sick....
6. When I'm sick...
Now keep in mind, I'd be willing to do this for my husband and I don't think these are unreasonable requests BUT...they all start with me! They are all self-serving.
I'm not married, yet I have learned a thing or two from married couples. Marriage is anything but self-serving. If you enter into it with that mindset, you're in for a rude awakening. I have heard many people compile lists of attributes they want in a spouse. I've heard about how he/she has to be an upgrade/asset/ or come second to Jesus Christ himself. I'm not saying lower your standards, burn your lists or cast your pearls among swine. You've got to live with the person for the rest of your life. What I am pointing out is that there is a consistent evaluation of what the person can do for you as opposed to what can you do for the person. A self-serving attitude is an emotional set-up.
I take delight in the little gifts that God has placed in my heart to naturally love. I'm doing my best to cultivate those gifts so that I can be a blessing to the body of Christ. If it involves becoming a blessing to a husband, that's awesome. If not, it's blessing God and his people which is the ultimate honor.
God is fully aware of the desires of your heart when it comes to a mate. And it's okay to prayerfully pursue romantic love. Just keep in mind that your potential mate is not Santa Claus or a genie. Your mate is a person with feelings, hurts, dreams and goals of their very own. Instead of looking for a lover who can serve you, focus on becoming more like love itself. The greatest definition of what love is and how to become it is found in 1st Corinthians 13:4-8.
This is my prayer and focus. I would love to be a wife to a man who considers me is his Proverbs 31. So, there is work that can be done on my heart so that I can be prepared to be that to a man one day. However, even if you don't get married, the same work that God does on your heart is the same work that's needed to be a devoted follower of Christ.
After all, it's not about becoming the woman of a man's dreams as much as it is about becoming a woman after God's own heart. I can't think of a better dream to pursue!
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