Forgive Yourself and Move On

I'm sure I'm not the only one who has wondered about the validity of karma in my life. Today was one of those days where I was thinking for hours about what experiences in my life are a result of karma coming on to me. I was doing some reading this morning and it sent me down a treacherous path of thoughts. I had to run a couple errands for work and when I made my first stop,  I couldn't even get out of the car at first. I pulled the key out of the ignition and just let myself cry it out.. There were some painful memories that were resurrected with the reading I did this morning. Somewhere deep down, I had convinced myself that it wasn't okay for me to really enjoy life because of mistakes I'd made years ago. I felt as though the reason why things weren't the way I wanted them now was because I was on punishment. It wasn't until I was driving to the gym that I realized how abusive those thoughts were.  No one was punishing me but me. I repented of my sins. I asked God for forgiveness. It was forgotten by everyone but me. I used my guilt to keep the transgressions alive and around to haunt me. If you've ever felt this way, remember the following: 

• You are GOD's child.He loves you and would never be okay with you living in guilt, fear, or depression(Jeremiah 29:11- For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.) He knows your heart. You can't hide anything from Him. Let Him be there for you.                                              
• Your thoughts are powerful.If you dwell on the negative incidents in your past, you simultaneously ruin the positive experiences that are headed your way. That's self-sabotage. Don't go there. When you start to feel guilty about your past, think of how merciful God is and how He is a God of second chances (or in my case, 30th and 58th chances). Dwell on the positive. Here's a great exercise: When you start to feel the negative energy seep in, think of all the blessings in your life. List them one by one no matter how small they might seem. 
• Understand that NO ONE is perfect. We ALL make mistakes. The important thing is to get back up and keep striving to be a better YOU.
• Never let others make you feel unworthy. I've seen it and experienced it. You fall and get back up yet there are others who see you fall and decide to remind you that you fell and are unworthy of a shot at being a better you. "I know how you are" or "You're not fooling anybody". It's unbelievable the horrible words people will say about you when you're trying to make a change. To get into the reasons of why they'd do it is counter-productive. Just focus on bettering yourself and let God take care of the thorns. 

It's the Simple Things (Gratitude PhotoJournal):

On this particular day, the morning scenery from my window was less than spectacular. No sun in the sky and a bunch of snow on the ground. It was pretty depressing. So I prayed a little prayer asking God to send a beautiful sunny afternoon and lovely evening. He answered my prayers. This is just a photographic reminder that God cares and He answers prayers. 

 Jesus, thank you for your sweet love. 

Amen. 

Naked Goodness :)

Naked's Mighty Mango Juice is my absolute favorite fruit juice right now but I don't buy it often 

because Naked Juice is a tad bit on the pricey side.

I'm 24 and while I don't think I'm invincible, my habits might suggest otherwise. I don't hold back when it comes to cheddar cheese and sour cream. I can easily punish 3 chocolate chip cookies from Subway. While I don't eat those things every single day, it's still more than once a week. I've decided to really keep a close eye on what I eat. One of my sisters mentioned that she was going to try and be a vegan for a month. At first, I was interested in the idea and said I'd do it. I made a promise to myself last year that I'd stop making decisions based on emotions and this time, I messed up. It's not bad to want to be a vegan but deep down, I knew I had to be honest with myself. I don't want to be a vegan. I like having sour cream and cheddar cheese. So where do I go from there? 

I've decided to stop labeling myself and just eat consciously. Sounds like a cop out but really it's not. I know myself. If I label myself a vegan, I'll look longingly at all the things that I'd love to have but can't because I've placed this weight on myself. For some it may not be considered a weight and more power to them. So I've decided to do what feels right. I started eating consciously on Sunday and so far, I've been loving the choices I've made. I haven't had any dairy but I don't feel like I'm going into withdrawal. I also haven't had any processed sweets either. I even saw a whole jar of Hershey's kisses and turned it down willingly. My boss brought in boxes of Girl Scout Cookies and I haven't been interested in them. Weird, uh? This isn't to say that I'll never eat sweets or dairy again but it's a good feeling when you don't have to have a war with yourself on whether or not you'll eat something because of a restriction. I think that if more people ate consciously in their youth, great habits would form and the onset of a lot of preventable diseases would be far less prevalent in our society. 

One of the important things I've noticed over the past couple days is that there always has to be an alternative. I decided to lay off the chocolate chip cookies but I am replacing it with some of my other favorite snacks that are on the healthy side. I love baby carrots and I have grown to really love traditional hummus. Hummus is sooooo good and it's such a guilt-free snack! I just have to say that two tablespoons of Safeway hummus are only 45 calories. I couldn't believe something so good was so low in calories. Two tablespoons are more than enough for a good snack with carrots. I also LOVE frozen blueberries. It's like sucking on really yummy candy except it's totally good for you. I'm having fun with the different  healthy choices. Try to make a couple changes. You might like how you feel! :)

"I wake up ready to litigate. You wake up ready to decorate."

One of my favorite hobbies is decorating! I really enjoy the whole process of painting, creating, planning, shopping, and installation. Funny thing is that I know that I'd never want to be an interior decorator for a living. It's something I really would like to keep as a creative hobby. I don't really paint often at all and but every time I decide to pull out a brush, I'm reminded of how therapeutic painting is for me. Just painting a simple sample square in my bathroom was just so relaxing for me. So I'm in the process of decorating my bathroom. It's very manly and burgundy (it used to be my dad's bathroom). So I'm changing it around to fit my taste. I've pulled inspiration from so many different places. I'm still trying to figure out what to do for the shower curtain but I have a solid blueprint for the bathroom and it's accessories! I'm so excited. Can't you tell?! Here are a few of my inspirations for the bathroom:

The color palate of this blanket has my name written all over it. 

Joan & the gang did a makeover on Lynn's apartment. Quite frankly, it's one of my favorite episodes because of the makeover. 

What a beautiful home for all your pistachios, almonds, pecans, and acorns. 

I love how Anthropologie stores their candles in glass cylinders with sand inside; something I will definitely be copying :)

Hello, World!

So, I’ve always said  that I’d start another blog. I had one blog for about two years but I think I outgrew it (and yes, it is possible to outgrow a blog). After church one Sabbath, my dad gave me a big hug and told me I just looked so happy. I laughed and said thanks. He went on to say that he felt like he hadn’t seen me this happy since before puberty. On the outside, I laughed. On the inside, I cringed.

Had I really looked so down for so long? Puberty was many moons ago. It was meant in jest but it really got me to thinking. Things have REALLY changed. I feel the change. Someone else who helped bring me into this life sees the change. Why not celebrate the change? Okay, so what’s changed? Life as I know and understand it.

This blog’s purpose is to serve as a mirror to my creative self.  It’s been said that every writer should have a blog because a blog is a chance to endorse expression of thought and/or feeling on a public platform.  Effective expression of thought is important for the writer I strive to be but passion is the lifeblood behind the type of person I strive to become. So, I’m ready to ACTIVELY learn, pursue and explore my passions, interests, opinions, and share with whosoever will read!

Three cheers for the journey of dreaming something up!

P.S. I love you, Dad!